Marriage

As a Christian I believe homosexuality is wrong. And so as a Christian, I can't agree with the notion of homosexual marriage.

But when asked whether homosexual marriage should be legalised, I realise that I must base all my arguments, one way or another, purely on the secular.

So on this topic, I have the following questions that I feel are unanswered:

- What purely secular debate exists? Where in the public forum is that debate? Are there physical/psychological/economic benefits of one family model over another? Children are the vulnerable in society - how are they advanaged or disadvantaged by gay marriage?

- Should the church be vilified for dogmatically opposing homosexuality? Is that not its prerogative?

- If gay marriage were legalised, is it reasonable for the church to refuse to facilitate such weddings?

- Why is the homosexual community infatuated with marriage? Doesn't the civil union serve exactly the same purpose? Isn't marriage somewhat representative of an "oppressive church state"?*

- Should the decision to allow or deny gay marriage be based on the outcomes of democratic debate, or simply "reason"? If we rely on democracy, the Christian church, along with the other major world religions, will have a loud voice. If we rely on reason, we need to be presented the facts.

I guess some of these questions relate to my own curiousity, and others directly relate to determining a solution.

I'm worried that my personal beliefs on homosexuality are taken as homophobia. It's worth remembering that I don't believe in sex outside of marriage. I'm pretty sure that I'm not phobic of these people. At the same time, I've lied, stolen and cheated to varying degrees... yet those degrees don't make a lot of difference. I'm not overly phobic of myself. But I probably should be.

*This seems to me to be the reason why heterosexual couples in committed relationships no longer seek marriage.