Fan Club becomes Official
I've been having far too much fun with my footy umpiring of late. And it has bugger-all to do with the footy. In fact, the footy that I've been umpiring has been of a relatively* poor standard. Last week I was out in the Dodges Ferry mud, this week it was in the Sorell water-hole.
Anyway, the story is, I have an official fan club. Never underestimate the power of hair, and trying to play soccer with a football, and talking to the crowd (basically going against every shred of wisdom imparted to me by the gods of umpiring). Every time I went by a certain flank, some guys would start serenading me (probably Wolfmother's greatest hits, but I can't be sure). Then, behind the goals, there was this legend with dreads. We got talking while I was waiting at the post (a giant faux pas for any sort of umpire: thou shalt not interact with the crowd) and he'd seen me the previous week at Dodges and he and his mates had been taking bets on whether I was a soccer player from wayback. This was due to attempts at juggling the footy during the half time break (soccer style). He reckons I got up to 30 - I think 10-15 was a more realistic number. Anyway, I had a drink in the bar afterwards and he came and introduced himself, and it was all very nice. It was at this stage that I confirmed the fact that I do have an "Official Fan Club". Putting boundary umpiring on the map: it's gotta be good for footy.
I think, now, I'm gonna have to preface blowing my whistle with a McEnroe-style "The ball was out".
It is sad that I can't actually be original. Oh well, maybe it'll happen one day.
*Relative to anything from Auskick to the AFL.
Anyway, the story is, I have an official fan club. Never underestimate the power of hair, and trying to play soccer with a football, and talking to the crowd (basically going against every shred of wisdom imparted to me by the gods of umpiring). Every time I went by a certain flank, some guys would start serenading me (probably Wolfmother's greatest hits, but I can't be sure). Then, behind the goals, there was this legend with dreads. We got talking while I was waiting at the post (a giant faux pas for any sort of umpire: thou shalt not interact with the crowd) and he'd seen me the previous week at Dodges and he and his mates had been taking bets on whether I was a soccer player from wayback. This was due to attempts at juggling the footy during the half time break (soccer style). He reckons I got up to 30 - I think 10-15 was a more realistic number. Anyway, I had a drink in the bar afterwards and he came and introduced himself, and it was all very nice. It was at this stage that I confirmed the fact that I do have an "Official Fan Club". Putting boundary umpiring on the map: it's gotta be good for footy.
I think, now, I'm gonna have to preface blowing my whistle with a McEnroe-style "The ball was out".
It is sad that I can't actually be original. Oh well, maybe it'll happen one day.
*Relative to anything from Auskick to the AFL.
posted by BSJ-rom at 1:42 pm
6 Comments:
That's what happens with sub standard footy games the umpiring becomes the focus right?
Yeah, but usually because the umpiring drops to the standard of the footy. I am proud to say that the standard of umpiring from all members of the crew on Saturday was exceptional.
It's good to see you building good umpire-crowd relations.
I suppose the lower the standard, the more casual the umps are allowed to get. (None of the "KNOCK IT OUT! KNOCK IT OUT!" has been uttered I trust?)
Not so, michael. The lower the playing standard the lower the umpiring standards just because things get so messy. It's not "allowed".
Where does one sign up to said fan club?
(So I can avoid the place, naturally)
Dodges Ferry is their home...
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