Disempowered
Several bits and pieces have come together, or fallen apart to leave me banging my head against a brick wall, thinking those walls were doors...
This week has featured feelings of complete helplessness in a fight for decent choices. The people I thought should have been on my side were very much against me. Moreover, it wasn't just a "me against them" issue, rather, there were a lot of us against a few of them, but they have the power and they know how to cover their proverbials.
It is the fight for reasonable subject options. As I'm getting used to, the people in power who should respond to reason, simply do not. I met on Thursday with the Associate Dean, the Head of School, the Course Co-ordinator, and two engi society reps (pres and v/pres). The faculty reps (A/Dean, HoS and CC) seem to have split personalities: one moment they are all for relevant subjects and the reason we can't do other subjects is because they are not "relevant" (when, in the next breath, they say that they are). Then all of a sudden, it becomes all about the rules. We can't break the rules. And they make it look like they would be breaking the rules... but they wouldn't be, because they make the rules. They make the rules so that they can be broken if they feel like it. They always cover their backs.
To add insult to injury, the one relevant subject offered to me (for my elective) is Advanced Dynamics, taken by the lecturer against whom I am leading an official complaint. The other two subjects are Intelligent Systems (AI stuff, all comms, computing and electrical based stuff) and Image Processing (more mechatronicsy and electrical). For both of these subjects the lecturers, when queried, suggested that there was very little application for mechanical students. In contrast, the CC is adamant that these are relevant subjects, though he did not specify whether they were more or less useful than the subjects that we were trying to do.
Anyway, if my situation makes sense to you, please spend a few minutes to explain it to me, because it seems like a load of old tosh to me.
It's funny to think that in a few years time it could well be me making those decisions that nobody likes and/or understands. Scary thought. Could do with a wee bit of God's guidance. I don't know.
The other airy-fairy issue that has been plaguing me is work. Again something that I am in control of, but again, in no control of. One must learn to love dualisms. In any case, I still have Hydro and BHP to get back to me to talk about interviews. And I have the DMO who will get back to me before the end of August with either an offer or another rejection. At least they will give me feedback. But, again helpless.
I don't really like being out of control, or disempowered.
This week has featured feelings of complete helplessness in a fight for decent choices. The people I thought should have been on my side were very much against me. Moreover, it wasn't just a "me against them" issue, rather, there were a lot of us against a few of them, but they have the power and they know how to cover their proverbials.
It is the fight for reasonable subject options. As I'm getting used to, the people in power who should respond to reason, simply do not. I met on Thursday with the Associate Dean, the Head of School, the Course Co-ordinator, and two engi society reps (pres and v/pres). The faculty reps (A/Dean, HoS and CC) seem to have split personalities: one moment they are all for relevant subjects and the reason we can't do other subjects is because they are not "relevant" (when, in the next breath, they say that they are). Then all of a sudden, it becomes all about the rules. We can't break the rules. And they make it look like they would be breaking the rules... but they wouldn't be, because they make the rules. They make the rules so that they can be broken if they feel like it. They always cover their backs.
To add insult to injury, the one relevant subject offered to me (for my elective) is Advanced Dynamics, taken by the lecturer against whom I am leading an official complaint. The other two subjects are Intelligent Systems (AI stuff, all comms, computing and electrical based stuff) and Image Processing (more mechatronicsy and electrical). For both of these subjects the lecturers, when queried, suggested that there was very little application for mechanical students. In contrast, the CC is adamant that these are relevant subjects, though he did not specify whether they were more or less useful than the subjects that we were trying to do.
Anyway, if my situation makes sense to you, please spend a few minutes to explain it to me, because it seems like a load of old tosh to me.
It's funny to think that in a few years time it could well be me making those decisions that nobody likes and/or understands. Scary thought. Could do with a wee bit of God's guidance. I don't know.
The other airy-fairy issue that has been plaguing me is work. Again something that I am in control of, but again, in no control of. One must learn to love dualisms. In any case, I still have Hydro and BHP to get back to me to talk about interviews. And I have the DMO who will get back to me before the end of August with either an offer or another rejection. At least they will give me feedback. But, again helpless.
I don't really like being out of control, or disempowered.
posted by BSJ-rom at 7:07 pm
6 Comments:
I think you should just do the normal mechanical engineering subject, get through it and pass.
Will a employer look at all your electives? They just want you to have a degree and have done well, and have ok people skills.
If the issue is personal learning, then you can do that in your own time. Just do the subjects you have to now, you can read your own books another time.
I don't care what subjects I do. I already know more than most 4th years in my own areas of interest. I have had plenty of years to read the internet and books to learn whatever I want. But it does not add up to a degree. That's why Im at uni trying to stitch it all together into a degree.
So yeah. The lecturer is like your boss. Give them what they want and move on.
You should try becoming a woman. I hear that they have become very empowered.
I have... it didn't do it for me. Too much effort too - doing too much stuff at once.
Fear not. I'm back to being a man.
I'll believe it when I see it.
mmm Crom as a woman? I can see him as one
Why is it so easy to see me as feminine? I don't understand.
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